Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
