did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Randomize
