just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
