I got chris browned last night
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I have feelings that need drinking.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
