Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
kristin has been a bad kristin
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
