im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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