Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
