There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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