Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
