OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize