It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
