Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
