I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
