We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
