I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
