So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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