as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
you win again, gameday.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
