Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
