p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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