I feel great
I just peed on a car
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
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