She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Randomize
