i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
This toilet bowl is my home.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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