For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Two words: blizzard sex
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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