It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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