my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I need a beard to bite.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
