Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
