Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
