My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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