I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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