i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
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