where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
