i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
