4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
