Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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