As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Damn victory sex feels great
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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