I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
