I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
