Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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