If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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