I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
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