I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Randomize
