Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
