So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Be still, my beating vagina.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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