I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
