Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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