If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
We don't watch enough power rangers
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
