There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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