I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
we're so committed to being not committed
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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