like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
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