can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Randomize
